I walked in Coffee Bean the other day, stood at the counter and waited for the guy to take my order. It was hot that day and I felt like having something cold…"can I have one ice blended mocha please" then the guy asked me for my pink card. About the same time I was gonna take my wallet outta my back pocket I felt something grabbing both my legs, at my thighs from the back…then so suddenly, I felt something up my butt!!!! I let out a very faint and girlish "uh" and turned around quickly…it was a kid..maybe three years old..trying to smell my butt!!!i looked at him as he had his hand on my thighs looking up at me and smiling. I looked around to see who the hell let their kid creep up and get his face right up my butt!!! "no no ta'al habeeby" said the maid in a typical pilipinoo accent. I kept looking around, I wanted to see whose kid this was. I didn’t see anything. There were three tables each occupied by two guy's who seemed not the type at all. There was another table with two ladies sitting, chatting ever so loudly. I kept looking at them. Nothing. Not even a glimpse. They just sat there yapping about god knows what while what most likely was their child was running around smelling other peoples butts!!!
The kid continued to wander around while his maid chased him, trying to keep him outta trouble I guess. I stood at the other side now, waiting for my drink. I kept looking around. Still nothing. None of the adults there were paying attention at all to this kid, only his Pilipino maid who followed him around seemed to care. "mista homaa, ua drinkkk is nowa reaadddyy" I turned around to pick up my drink. Guess what I felt now. Yup. Two small hands taking a hold of my thighs. But no, this time I knew what was coming. And before anything happened I clenched up my butt cheeks tight and braced for the incoming ;p

Sometimes you see things, read something, or just hear a song that will leave you utterly speechless…..

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,

Why do we think so much?? Why can't I live life day by day, not worrying about tomorrow?

So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care

I don’t want to do the right thing anymore…I want to do what I feel, say what I mean, I want to live my dream..

You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.

Last night, for a moment's time, hope visited me again…

I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

For the very first time, I knew what it felt like to be loved…

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be

I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.

I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

And after that moment was spent and gone…hope was no where in sight..

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me

But in that moment…I lived my dream…

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.

I cried…

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

Lyrics from James Blunt's Goodbye My Lover…

I just heard about the new mall they are building right in front of the American university in salmiya. Supposedly it's gonna be the hippest place in town. It's associated with the villa moda crowd, and you know what that means (if not then your probably it). And now I hear that someone has gotten the Victoria Secret franchise and they are going to open their first store in that new mall. Ah, just what Kuwait needed.

Our house smells of paint! My mom is returning to Kuwait soon after the surgery was successfully completed, she's been away now for over two months, so we thought it would be a nice thing if we would surprise her by painting the house in different colors and getting new furniture, giving it a new look.

Things are going to get real busy soon, so much to do in so little time. But am not bothered at all, actually I felt refreshed to have so much to do. I like the feeling of having something to do, it's much better then just sitting around and thinking all the time.

Speaking of something to do, I have an idea. How about starting a new blog? Not a personal one where I would complain and vent, or share my feelings and my desires, but a social blog. I don’t know, am thinking about a place where people can write down what they think about movies, books, restaurants, stuff like that. This would be a joint blog with more that one member in it…so if any of y'all are interested say so.

Hmmm…something else has been on my mind. Have you been in a relationship where you were expected to give much much more than what you would receive? It never bothered me before, and it doesn’t bother me that much now either, but I think that sometimes it becomes too much, I mean what if I can't give what they want?

There's a group who I would refer too as members of blogger high… hehe walla they remind me of high school, they even got their own popularity contest going on.

I don’t understand the point of having private blogs. Really, what's the point?

I never really knew how much I liked flirting…

Am not hungry, but still want to eat…

Am craving for some ice cream…

Am gonna go now…

Peace out ;p

Update:

Ok so a lot of you who commented on the last post believed that I am in love. Well am I? I really don’t know exactly what it is. One thing is for certain, you won't be hearing any wedding bells anytime soon. Not that I don't want to get married. Heck if it were up to me I would get married today before tomorrow (ya3ni elyoom gable bacher in English ;p) but it's not up to me. As a matter of fact, the person of interest in my real life story doesn’t share my feelings. She never did and she never will. Why, you ask? Well to put it in one word, bad luck (ok two words). Although in truth it's much more complicated than that. There was a time when I felt bitter and angry. Sad and lonely. There was a time when I felt I couldn’t breathe without her. Those were the worst of times. But am over that now. You see we never were in a boyfriend girlfriend relationship. We were good friends and we still are. I learned to live with the fact of it, and guess what, I never enjoyed our friendship as much as I do now. All it took was for me to remember the reason why I loved her so. Am not bitter anymore. I love my life. And I love the role she plays in my life. These are the best of times. Although I don’t know what will happen in the future, (I hope we'll always be friends) she will always occupy a special place in my heart.
So, if the last long paragraph got you confused or didn’t clear things up for y'all, this might. I am a man in love, but I am as single as they come. And as long as my memory doesn’t desert me, I will love her, in my own way.
Now let me ask you a question, can a guy like me fall in love again…I surely hope so….but can a girl fall in love with a guy like me, knowing how I feel…I sure hope so…
PS, mary just brought me my all time favorite snack, wwl you know what am talking about ;p so I have eat now, then I got to send some e-mail's…I still haven’t written part 3 of the story that am writing, so if you're following I hope that you'll forgive me, bs as with every artist, you cant rush inspiration (wayid thiqa adree ;p) so adios for now, hasta luego, sweet dreams, take care, see you on the other side of the moon (I always wanted to say that, t'was my childhood dream to become an astronaut) oh well…bah bye

You’ve probably heard this before, from me, or from a movie. You might have read it in a book, or this could be your story. Yeah, some of you sure have felt it. I did. I still do. I won't tell you guys what's gonna happen. Am not gonna tell you what to do or what to say. I won't give you advice, at least not today. I just wish you happiness. I love my life, and I wish you my kinda joy.

A friend just asked me to say what's the latest on my mind, well a lot is on my mind but right now I can't really think because of this nagging headache I've been having. I have been taking this strong antibiotic which causes the headaches to feel really worse then they are. So, what's the latest on my mind?
Well I finally had the energy today to go back to the gym. With me being sick feels like being a living dead creature. My life stops. I don’t go out, I don’t see anybody. I don’t talk to no one. I felt paralyzed. Being home alone makes a person feel sick, so imagine being sick and home alone. Well am not really complaining, it's just that this fever/infection/exhaustion wouldn’t go away. If it weren’t for one of my dearest friends sticking by me, keeping me company, staying up with me everyday till 2 am so I can take my medicine then I would have surely gone mad. I don’t know a lot of people that would do what she has done for me. Thanks to her this was my most enjoyable sickness ever ;p How can I show my appreciation to this person? How can anybody really show how much they care for another person? Do gifts really work? Maybe a personal card or a note with some kind and inspired words would work. A box of chocolate sounds nice, wonder what kind of message that would send? I never really know what gifts to give. I always was a sentimental fool believing the more thought a person put into the gift or the more time spent on it means a world more than the price they paid. Don’t get me wrong am not a gi39, but it's just too easy to get something somebody else thought of that would work for anybody. A gift should be personal, something from me to you. That said I am hoping that you guys would give me some great gift ideas, or at least you would share a story about a nice gift you received or gave to someone. On a normal day I would be creative enough to think of something so sentimental and sweet, but like I said this headache is just killing me and I can't think right now. Hmmmm, I have an idea! Am gonna start a gift tag. All the following bloggers must give me gifts: WWL, adorra, beyond q8ya, erzulie, temetwir, diigmaa……no? Ok maybe that was a bad idea. Never fear, am gonna come up with a real tag soon enough and all you guys are gonna hate me for it ;p


Ps…..if you still wanna gimme gifts it's ok ;)

I was walking by the staircase when I heard Mary, my maid, asking me if I wanted lunch now. On any other day I would have though her huge smile was unusual. Not today. Her smile said a lot. Mostly it said "thank you". It said thank you for appreciating what I do around here, thank you for being there for me, for believing me. She smiled for her hero, the one who defended her. I don’t feel like a hero, I don’t feel like a man for doing what I did. I think I was wrong.

Mary, an Indian woman in her early thirties, had a fight with Sophie, the other maid. Sophie is African, e7bishiya, about 19 years old. Unable to settle their own differences, they spread their problem to the rest of the household staff, with the majority supporting Sophie….not wanting to get into more details, I'll just tell you what I did today. Mary came to my room crying about how Sophie is falsely accusing her of stealing five KD from her. I was angry.

I have been alone at home for about a week now, everyone else is outta the country. All through the week I've been sick, still am. The only person who's been by my side helping me out physically was Mary. I trust her and appreciate all the work she does, especially now. To hear her cry and say that she wanted to leave just made my blood boil. I knew no one else around the house liked her and they all treated her badly, but to accuse her of this, they have gone too far now.

I suddenly found myself racing with anger. I walked up the stares to find Sophie sitting on the steps with her hand around her knees. I wanted them to stop. I wanted to scare her a little. I began to scream n shout, point and threaten. I didn’t realize what exactly I was doing until I raised my hand in the air pointing upstairs, and her reaction was to scream and cover her head. I stood there for a second. I was staring at her shaking and crying, she was scared to death. I left, went to my room. I was so aggravated my hands started to shake. I stood there for a minute looking at myself, trying to cool down the anger. My window was opened. I could hear someone on the roof. Someone on the roof was crying. I decided to take a shower. It cooled me down. Twenty minutes later back in my room I could still hear her crying on the roof. Oh my god, what have I become. Now I started to remember her face. How innocent and young it looked. I felt guilty.




Later in the day a friend who I adore suddenly told me that they don’t like me anymore….and it's killing me